Sunday, October 5, 2008

O Brokenstar


I've been walking all night,
Staring at the Sky, I've come so far,
All I want to do tonight,
Is find you O Broken star.

I had seen you last night,
And expressed my wish to you,
As I woke up to the shining sun today,
I found my wish had come true.

You appeared across the sleeping sky,
Cutting through the dark night.
And left your mark between the stars,
Flying high and burning bright.

It is like only you knew,
What I want and what I feel,
I wish to tell you more about,
These dreams I still conceal.

But where are you now?
I've been searching all around,
I know these heavens hide you,
At a place you can't be found.

Is it this tranquil moon,
That conceals you from my sight,
Or is it that lofty mountain,
That hides from me your fiery flight.

You faded away last night,
And it has been lonely since then.
If I get to see you tonight,
I'd make a wish of meeting you again.

O broken star , My Broken star,
I hope you would return someday,
And when we meet again,
I won't let you fade away.

2 comments:

Photogenic Devil said...

i found tht MY wish had come true

then
i walked all nite kardo
walking ke saath u confuse a no of tenses


u appeared ACROSS??wrong
i knw wat ur are trying to say leking jo bh hain galat galta hain
refrase it


then u again confuse tense

u say
its only like u KNEW
THEN THE NEXT LINE SHLD BE
wat i WANTED& WAT I FELT


THEN
stop using these with the dreams

i wish to tell u more about
the dreams i still conceal


i knw THE heavens hide u
at a place ki jagah kardo
sumwhere u cant be found


is it THE tranquil moon

that shades u from my sigh'/that hides u from me

stop using conceal again and again


the last two paras u dnt comlicate and manage for the first time in this poem atleast
simple beauty

needs a lil bit of grammatical work

but yeah SO DARN YOU !!!

Siddhant said...

i noticed that is like using "this" and "that" ..... mote that THE ... (in the sense of pointing things out perhaps .. )

and yeah ... its SO DARN A PART OF ME ..... as all my poems are ...

well ... this poem ... it is just like you descrobed it earlier .... "disjoint and childish"